I originally had started with a working title of "Inspiring Yourself to Greatness!" for this blog and then as I continued to ponder my subject matter, I shifted to being better. Why the change? Lived experience without a doubt. There is a paradox inherent in becoming better or the pursuit of greatness. At least that is how I see it. One the one hand, I can say with conviction that I have always been highly goal-oriented. No doubt that comes from how I was raised and expectations for achievement from my parents - finish high school, go to university, start a good career, raise a family and so on. However, I can also say that those goals and expectations were also a significant source of frustration, anxiety and stress! Over time life has a way of teaching us that some of the goals and expectations set for us were actually never meant for you nor were they going to give you a happy life.
In the past several years, I have really dug into this paradox of goals and expectations. On the one hand I am still a firm believer that one should set some goals and expectations for oneself. Even set some personal Big Hairy Audacious Goals (BHAGs). These "dreams" can be a great source of inspiration and motivation. On the other hand, I have also learned that life rarely proceeds in any kind of linear or predictable fashion - either for good or bad. Our recent pandemic experience is but one big example of that. As a direct result of the pandemic, I would say that my work has irrevocably taken a shift from being predominantly in-person engagements to at least a 50/50 in-person to virtual work. Just prior to the seismic shift wrought by the pandemic, my goals and expectations were ones of continued growth or certainly stabilizing at the significant level of work I had created since 2012. COVID upended those expectations and called upon me to pivot. What I can say, however, looking back is that being open to change, opportunity, and new realities has led me to the creation of a series of leadership development modules that I had always thought about but never created. In addition, the forced change has opened up a plethora of new international work that I would never have imagined back in 2019.
Given that soliloquy, what do I suggest you and I take away within the context of the blog title - how do we inspire ourselves to be better (if not great). A few thoughts spring to mind.
First, I advise you to really dig into what you want out of your personal and professional life. REALLY DIG IN! If you are anything like me, a lot of what we are pursuing is done relatively unconsciously. We have built up a series of goals and expectations over time because that seems like something we are supposed to be doing. Society and social media don't help us in this regard and it takes a great deal of courage and intentionality to walk to the pace of a different drummer. As I say this, I truly hope that your starting point in this self-reflection is your personal life. I am a strong believer that my work - your work - must serve your personal goals, not the other way around. Seems self-evident perhaps, but all too often we lose ourselves in the demands of work and sacrifice the things and experiences that will really fulfill us. As I have engaged with my friends, family and trusted colleagues over the past few years in particular, this attentiveness to who we really are and what we are really meant to be/achieve has never been more important. I can look back on the past 40 years of my life and understand that some of the things that I was doing didn't really bring me happiness and, in too many instances, kept me trapped in jobs, careers and relationships that actually did me harm.
First step then in being or becoming better is to really get clarity on where you want to go.
Second, expectations are important. Even more important, however, is the quality and specificity of those expectations. One of the most powerful tactics that I believe I have employed with myself and for my clients is to drive specificity, detail, targets and timelines in respect of this future state of affairs. In addition, I have tried to establish a multi-year perspective on where I would like to be along with an annual set of goals that become even more specific and detailed. This "visioning" exercise and template is updated at least annually and assessed for progress on at least a monthly basis. I use the same tool - as warranted - with my clients. Without exception, they have all indicated that this has been one of the most powerful tools in our work together. The key here is that none of us lack for dreams and expectations. What we too often lack is a level of detail that helps to hold us accountable to a specific set of actions and milestones.
Third - dreams, visions and accountability are all for nought if we are not prepared to take substantive preparation and action towards those stated goals. Again, it is absolutely not enough to declare a positive personal, leadership or organizational vision for the future without being prepared to put in the preparation, work and effort to succeed or to even have a chance at success. So, within the context any challenge - personal or business - the benchmarks of achievement should be set and then used to drive your actions. As an aside, I also get a lot of value in comparing notes with others. What have they done? How have they achieved? What choices have they made? Why? Each of us must often seek some means to challenge our own limiting beliefs and assumptions about what is possible. Learn from others. Be inspired by others.
Third, appreciate that the best laid plans never proceed as developed. So aside from all of the preparation and effort that must go into any endeavor we must develop the mental fortitude and strength of commitment to our targeted goals. We also have to be prepared to be flexible. This is where the nature of our goals - or vision - becomes critically important. If I define success by having a bigger house or a "more important" job by a certain date I might find myself extraordinarily frustrated and demoralized if I am not on target 100% of the time. If, however, I define my life through more immutable goals (e.g., happy with life, in supportive relationships, living into new experiences) we can find that our goals/destination remain a beacon of hope rather than a demoralizing, never-to-be achieved endpoint. Accountability to self and to others comes from an ability to respond to adversity - both anticipated and completely unanticipated - to continue along a path that allows us to continue to succeed rather than give up at the first sign of difficulty. This is not simply a "rose-coloured glasses" mentality at work. It's not blind optimism. However, it is surely beyond a woe is me/victim mentality as well. I recognize that there are some events that can be so dramatic as to be beyond our control in pursuit of our goals (e.g., COVID). This is where power, strength and detail of goals, expectations and visions becomes critically important. If the vision is powerful enough I am convinced we will find a way forward even if that means changing tactics and timing to get there. We remain committed to success despite setbacks.
Finally, there are definitely going to be times when we fall short in terms of our commitment and effort, where we don't follow through in terms of stated strategies or tactics. As I have often said, this becomes the time to use our plan as a tool to reevaluate - not punish. In my estimation the former approach leads to an opportunity to reset and recommit (e.g., change strategy, change timing, change tactics) to a preferred set of goals. The latter approach of chastisement too often leads to despair, victimization and demotivation.
And remember - every year, the vision can get updated, new goals set, new improvement targets set. After last week's experience, after last month's experience, after last year's experience...I have learned and know myself better, have cemented what is important to me, and given me the vision and courage to discard what no longer serves me. The power of vision, expectations, goals, committed preparation and constant evaluation lead to greater levels of possibility.
What can you say about your expectations and commitment? What is possible for you? As Henry Ford is purported to have said, whether you believe you can or believe you can't you are right.
On that note, I've recently updated my personal plan to support a whole new level of personal growth, development and happiness that will see my professional and business development serve my personal vision.
It's all about leadership and in this case its leadership for and about yourself. The pot of gold awaits those prepared to truly set the goals, make the effort and recommit through challenges.
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Greg Hadubiak, MHSA, FACHE, CEC, PCC
Executive Coach/Consultant
BreakPoint Solutions
gregh@breakpoint.solutions
780-918-0009
Helping leaders realize their strengths and enabling organizations to achieve their potential through the application of my leadership experience and coaching skills. I act as a point of leverage for my clients. I AM their Force Multiplier.
